The Chapter of Change

“The only time you should look back is to see how far you have come.”

I lost control of my bike during a 4 hour ride and my body was covered in bruises, they were a colorful addition to my cap and gown the following weekend.  My sister and future brother in law came into town (they are engaged) for the occasion.  I went to Houston, interviewed with lululemon, was handed the most expensive piece of paper I currently own, then raced at Knoxville 70.3.

While at my graduation I sat and applied for jobs on my phone during the commencement speeches, I have always been a multitasker I couldn’t just sit still and enjoy the moment.  After receiving my diploma I got a text asking if I wanted to leave and head to dinner.  Of course!  I couldn’t wait to celebrate with the people I love and who have been through the journey with me from the start.  I wanted a few more people there but for some reason family was all that mattered.  We had the most amazing dinner at Camille’s on the River.  I couldn’t stop smiling. We went back to the hotel and popped another bottle of Moet and went to gamble in the casino.  Sadly, I did not win the jackpot or any money for that matter.  The weekend came and went, next on my agenda was Knoxville.  My mind was racing all week about how I would tackle the 70.3 beast in front of me.  My induction into the sport of triathlon, was defined by wearing only my 1 piece swim suit for the whole race.  No bike shorts with padding.  Needless to say chaffing galore, sunburnt buttcheeks because they weren’t always tucked in,  and a raw tailbone were my prizes that lasted me a month.  In all seriousness, I met some of the people I follow on Instagram in person, and they remembered the girl who wore a swimsuit.  HOLLA.  I don’t recall every mile of the race but despite the rain, no bike shorts, painful bike ride.  I remember feeling like a champ when I finished.  My parents and Oliver were there the whole time and greeted me at the finish line.  It was everything I could have wanted out of a first race.

The two biggest hurdles I had climbed were now in my rearview, next up was finding a job.  Then lululemon sent me an email about getting hired, a company always wanted to be a part of wanted me to join their team.  I was thrilled, but how would it be enough for me to be happy?  For a while I continued to interview with other companies to find a proper job.  Finally one day I defended my job and role to someone and realized I am happy, love my job and it is my passion.  I went through a time where I questioned myself, my relationships, and goals in life. lululemon has helped to realign myself in each of those areas, sure my goals are the same, but putting them down on paper to read and share with others is pretty ballsy.  It is something I have never done before. Successful behavior change often includes deliberate and strategic goal-setting.​

I was pretty selfish last year, I did what I wanted personally to give myself a shot, because before last year I always felt I had to do what others wanted or to look good in my parents eyes.  In looking back I was trying to practice self love, how can you give to someone else when you feel uneasy or unsure about yourself.

This is more of an update and a recommitment to blogging again. I will share more of the parts from 2015 I haven’t mentioned throughout this 2016 year.  My life is less chaotic, I am only working one full time job at the moment, and training for triathlon.  The exciting news I am considering sharing my art and creations on etsy for another income.  In 2016, I am committed to staying connected with friends, blogging, creating my future, and living in possibility.  It’s funny how my life 12 months ago is vastly different on so many levels but so similar.  I am the same person but my vision and goals are much clearer since I am constantly aware of what they are now.